CD IELTS Prep
All band comparisons

Task 2 · Problem and solution · Work

When trained graduates leave the country that educated them

A brain-drain essay whose band 9 answer stops treating emigration as disloyalty and starts treating it as information about domestic conditions.

The question

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Many countries invest heavily in training doctors, engineers and other skilled professionals, only for large numbers of them to emigrate soon after qualifying. Why does this happen, and what measures could reduce it?

A 250-word discursive essay — the half of the paper that carries two thirds of the marks. This prompt is original, written in the standard format for teaching purposes — it is not taken from any past paper.

What separates the three answers

The 6.5 wants to stop people leaving, the 7.5 wants to make staying more attractive, and the 9 points out that the conditions driving emigration also drive the resignations of those who stay.

The three answers

Band 6.5

265 words (the task asks for at least 250)

The answer works. It addresses the task, the reader follows it, and the meaning survives — but ideas stay general, linking is mechanical, wording repeats, and small errors are visible throughout.

The answer

In many developing countries, the government is spending a lot of money for the education of the doctors and engineers, but after the graduation these people are leaving the country and going to work abroad. This phenomenon is called brain drain and it is a big problem for these countries.

There are some reasons for this problem. Firstly, the salary in the foreign countries is much higher. A doctor can earn maybe five times more in a developed country, so it is normal that he wants to go there. Secondly, the working condition in the home country is not good. In many hospitals there is not enough equipment and the doctors are working very long hours. Moreover, some people are going abroad because they want a better future for their children, for example a better education and a better life quality4.

This problem can be solved in different ways. Firstly, the government should increase the salary of these professionals so they will not leave1. Secondly, the government can make a rule that the students who studied with the government money must work in the country for some years, otherwise they have to pay back the money2. In addition, the government should invest more in the hospitals and the universities to make the working condition better.

In conclusion, the main reasons of the brain drain are the low salary, the bad working condition and the search of a better life3, and the government should increase the salary, make a compulsory service and improve the facilities. Only in this way the country can keep its talented people.5

What an examiner notices

  1. 1. Task response

    the government should increase the salary of these professionals so they will not leave

    The essay has just described countries that cannot afford hospital equipment. Where the money for a large across-the-board pay rise comes from is never asked.

  2. 2. Task response

    must work in the country for some years, otherwise they have to pay back the money

    A concrete proposal, and the strongest thing in the essay — but it is not examined at all. Would a compelled doctor stay after the bond expires?

  3. 3. Coherence and cohesion

    In conclusion, the main reasons of the brain drain are the low salary, the bad working condition and the search of a better life

    Six items restated in their original order. The conclusion mirrors the body instead of drawing anything from it.

  4. 4. Lexical resource

    a better future for their children, for example a better education and a better life quality

    'Better' three times in one sentence, and 'life quality' inverts the standard collocation 'quality of life'.

  5. 5. Grammatical range and accuracy

    Only in this way the country can keep its talented people.

    A fronted restrictive adverbial requires inversion — 'can the country keep'. The structure was worth attempting, which is why the slip is instructive rather than damaging.

One honest caveat

Band labels here describe what each piece of writing demonstrates against the four published assessment areas, paraphrased in plain language. They are teaching illustrations produced for this site, not official material, and no sample has been marked by a test provider. Real scripts are marked whole; two answers with the same label can still look quite different from each other, and nothing on this page can promise anyone a particular result.